We are Family

This Mother's Day I was reminded of all the ways I am included in family. My Saturday started at my dear friend Nora's house. Eddie, the kids and I went out to the farm where she and her family live and spent the day with them. They killed and BBQed one of their sheep for a feast with fresh salad, beans and tortillas.  Many years ago, Nora and her sisters lost their mom and a year or two ago Nora decided that I would be her new mom. I kind of blew it off, saying something like, "I'm too young to be your mom!" But Nora meant it. This Mother's Day, she had us over, she honored me, gave me gifts and I suddenly realized that Nora needed a mother and God had provided her one in me.

Later that night, I was sitting in our church as the men and young people had prepared a special dinner for all the moms. I was surrounded by my church family and was so proud to see Eddie and the kids serving the food and helping out. During that dinner I got a call from one of our former foster sons, Jairo. He called to say Happy Mother's Day, but also to share the news that he finally got his Green Card after 9 years of trying his case in immigration courts. What a celebration! What great news! And, by the way, could I help him with another form he needs to fill out? I realized then that, even though he moved out of our house 5 years ago and we live thousands of miles away, I'm still his American mom who can help him navigate scary legal forms and #adulting.

The Holy Spirit began to whisper to me, "He sets the lonely in families."

The next day, Mother's Day (Sunday), our guest preacher said that Jesus prioritized family and creating family with those who share the faith. Again, the verse, "Father to the fatherless, defender of widows....He sets the lonely in families" echoed in my spirit.

Psalm 68:5 A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. 6 God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing;

Holidays are the times when we miss our loved ones the most. Missed birthdays and celebrations are a sacrifice our family makes to do the work we do in Belize. Our precious niece, Ziya turned 5 this weekend and we missed it. Last week I missed the passing of my dearest cousin, Christine, who was only 45. I prayed for Christine's family from afar and wished I could be there to grieve with them.

Nora and Jairo aren't the only ones whom God has provided a family for. I'm reminded that I, too, have been lonely and I, too, have been set in a family. If Nora hadn't invited us out, I would have stayed home on Saturday wishing I could spend it with my mom or mother-in-law. God set me in Nora's family, so our family wouldn't be alone on Mother's Day. He set me in Jairo's family, so I would have someone reach out and call me, giving me great news and work to do. He set me in my church family, so I would have a community to pray, praise and serve with. He has seen my loneliness and provided for me. He leads me out of my prison of loneliness, isolation, depression with singing.

Lately our nuclear family has been through a hard season and God has sent us friends and family to shore us up in our sadness, confusion and loneliness. Our family is big and deep and wide. It spans oceans and countries, cultures and languages.

How has God provided a family for you in your times of loneliness? How have you been family to an orphan, a widow, or someone else in need?

*Photos from our Mother's Day celebrations will be included in this month's newsletter, coming out the first Tuesday of June. Sign up on our website to get monthly updates and read monthly blogs like this one.

Feeding Lambs

The passage in John 21 where Jesus reinstates Peter has been living in my head rent-free since Easter. Before Jesus' betrayal and death, Pete had insisted he would be loyal to Jesus until the end- only to deny him three times when the pressure turned up. In John 21 we see

the resurrected Jesus take Peter aside and put his finger on this point of shame and call Peter into new levels of selfless service to God and others.

15 When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”

16 Again Jesus said, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”

17 The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”

Jesus said, “Feed my sheep."

There is so much to dig into in this passage, but for this blog I want to focus on Jesus' call to pivot away from self-love, self-sufficiency and self- preservation. Jesus says love me, serve others and give your life away for this cause. When Peter denied Jesus on the eve of his death, I'm sure so many fears and emotions were swirling around his head. To identify with Christ would mean to potentially share the same fate; to deny him meant Peter would live to see another day. Self-preservation isn't a bad thing; it's very human to want to protect yourself from alienation, discomfort and pain. But in following Jesus, we are called to surmount the pull of self-preservation.

Jesus' insisted that Peter take care of his followers. "Feed my lambs." "Take care of my sheep." "Feed my sheep." This was more than Jesus asking him a favor, Jesus was reminding Peter that he had work to do. It wasn't time to go back to the life he knew before following Christ (being a fisherman); he had a higher calling.

Today, in my life, Jesus asks, "Do you love me more than these?" Do you love me more than the pull to put yourself first? Do you love me more than comfort and convenience? Will you feed my lambs? Will you protect the innocent? Will you forget your former life, moving ever deeper into the waters of selflessness?

To Peter, Jesus issued a warning. "18 Very truly I tell you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” 19 Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!”

Unlike Peter, it is unlikely we will be martyred for our faith. But there is a death in our nature that takes place when we pick up our crosses to follow. Our nature says to look out for number one. It says to do what we've gotta do to survive. It puts limits on how, who and when we will serve. Agape love, the selfless love of God, is what empowers us to choose selflessness, choose others first and walk the path that Christ took. The ministry I work for, Agape International Missions, is named after the kind of love that forsakes all else in service to the least of these; the lambs.

Like Peter, you may already have decided to drop your nets and follow Jesus, but along the way the cost of following got pretty steep and you faltered. Maybe you turned back to your former life. Maybe you denied Jesus in your heart, words or life choices.

You may have walked away, but Jesus still calls you. He calls you because you have a destiny you can't achieve on your own. You'll never get there by choosing comfort or choosing self. Will you feed His lambs? Will you follow?

To Never be Ruthless Again

The Bible tells the story of Ruth, a Moabite woman who stuck by her mother-in-law's side when nearly all had been lost. Ruth's mother-in-law, Naomi, was an immigrant Jew living in Moab to avoid a famine in her land. She and her husband had built a life together in Moab and seen their two sons marry local Moabite women. As the years passed, Naomi's husband and both sons died, leaving the women with no one to provide for them or protect them.

Naomi decided to return to Judah, where she heard there was food again. Ruth was given the option of returning to her own family, her own people, but instead she chose to stay with Naomi.

Ruth 1:16 But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. 17 Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.”

I've been reflecting recently on who we decide to attach ourselves to. Naomi was homeless, grief-stricken and bitter. She couldn't have been much fun of a travel companion as they made their way 60 or so miles back to her place of birth. She had left her hometown as a member of a close-knit family and returned just a shell of who she had once been. Most people in Ruth's situation would cut their losses and hope for a new start, but Ruth was determined to keep her wagon hitched to Naomi's, no matter the cost.

Human nature seems to gravitate towards egotism, over altruism. People are more prone to try to catch a ride on a rising star than make their bed with the beggars and the outcasts. Who we associate with, who we connect ourselves to, is telling. Are we looking to benefit from an acquaintance? Are we hoping their good luck will rub off on us? When someone loses all their advantages, all their privilege or power, do we draw closer, or draw away?

Many generations after Ruth, a descendent of hers humbled himself, identified with the lost and the needy, hung out with the poor and disenfranchised. Instead of exalting in his own position; or surrounding himself with the powerful and pious, Jesus hung out with lowly outsiders.

Philippians 2

5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

6Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant,

being made in human likeness. 8And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!

The Free Dictionary defines ruthless as being without compassion or pity, merciless. Even though it's not part of the origins of the word, I find it interesting that the piece that speaks of compassion and mercy is Ruth. Let's remember her today. Let's chose to operate in compassion, in humility. Let's chose to align and ally ourselves with the hurting, with the bitter and those who grieve. Let's purpose in our souls to never be RUTHless again.