The Comforts of Home

Part of the process of moving to a completely new place is establishing a new normal; a new home and new routines. The question when you're living cross-culturally is how much comfort do you sacrifice in order to assimilate, and how much of your cultural norms do you maintain, in order to feel at-home.

Eddie and I have been remarking how it's the little things we miss about our American/Canadian lifestyle. Things like drinking tap water, picking up fast food through a drive-through, prepackaged salads and meals aren't life-changing non-negotiables, but if we had them, we'd be comforted by their familiarity.

The house we're living in is a year-long rental. It's big and comfortable by Belizean standards and we feel blessed to have it for our family's re-introduction to Belize. Looking ahead to establishing a home of our own brings up questions of square footage, acreage, the level of finishings etc. These details are constantly being put on the scale of comfort vs conformity. We want our home to be welcoming, not ostentatious. We are committed to continuing to live a generous, hospitable, debt-free lifestyle.

Even as we are in the throes of house hunting, we know that the creature comforts we miss don't offer lasting comfort. They stroke our egos or comfort our flesh, but they are just conveniences after all.

In John 14, Jesus tells his disciples about the place His Father has prepared for them in heaven. For many people, particularly those who have lived a painful life, this promise is what gets them through the hard times. But further down in that chapter, Jesus promises an even better comfort than the hope of heaven:

John 14:16 (KJV) says, "And I will pray to the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever;"

More than images of castles in the sky, this is what brings comfort to the here and now. The Comforter, God's Holy Spirit, is available to bring counsel, peace, joy in every circumstance. He, not family heirlooms or new technology, is the essential ingredient to making our life here a home.

If you have never experienced the comforting presence of God's Spirit in your life, it's available to you today. I honestly can't explain the inner peace it brings, or predict what His presence may do in your life, but I guarantee that it's real and its worth the risk.

The journey of knowing God starts with a realization and confession that, try as we might, we fail. We aren't perfect; we disappoint and hurt people, we manipulate or lie to protect ourselves...we are human, not God. From there, we ask God to forgive all the things we've done that have fallen short of His perfection and ask Him to take over our lives, sending His Spirit as comforter. This begins a fresh start to a new you.

If you have taken this step or have questions about it, please reach out to me privately via email: rescuedren@gmail.com. I pray that you would experience the life and comfort of the Spirit in your life as well.

Life is short....and long

There have been several deaths here recently that have rocked the Belizean community. One event last week was a helicopter crash that took the lives of four Belizean soldiers; this only a month after the world mourned for Kobe Bryant, his daughter and friends in another helicopter crash.

Closer to home for me is my dear friend, Pastor Timo, who has been on death's door for months. I visit whenever I am able to go to the village and pray with him. He mostly doesn't speak; the pain is too great. He cannot walk and doesn't eat. It hurts to visit. It hurts to see him and it hurts to know that I cannot change anything. For the four soldiers, death came in an instant. For Pastor Timo, death has stayed just beyond reach; just on the other side of his suffering.

A good friend of ours here, Sarita, has been to three funerals in the last month. Then, last week, her mom was shot in the head in a random shooting. Her mom survived, but has a long recovery ahead of her. Eddie and I are supporting Sarita and her family as much as they have allowed us to. We can't imagine walking the path that they suddenly find themselves on.

Psalm 90: 12 says "So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

These things, along with news about the Corona Virus outbreak, have stirred me to number my days. I don't know how long I will live. I may live to be a centenarian or not live past this week. I can't control the spread of viruses or the path of a stray bullet. All I can control is how I spend the time I have, while I have it.

More likely than not, you and I have many more years to spend in life. Plenty of time to make decisions and change our minds. Time to make relationships and invest in them. Time to take a chance and start again. Life is usually long, afterall. I probably still have more days ahead of me than those behind. So, while I will number my days and check in with myself on how I am spending them, I won't let the fear of less days steal the joy of today.

Strength in Weakness

Many of us in ministry or social work/development work struggle with what's called a Savior complex. We see the hurt in the world and can sometimes believe it's up to us to save it. Mahatma Gandhi famously said, "BE the change you want to see in the world." I agree with that wholeheartedly. It becomes a problem when we think that we have the answers without fully understanding the context of the culture or person we are trying to help. Even worse is to lose sight of the problems and weaknesses we have in ourselves, while focusing on "fixing" those around us.

Matthew 7:3-5 says, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye."

I love this passage because it calls out the sin of hypocrisy in me. It causes me to step back and look at myself; to take inventory of the things that blind me to my own shortcomings. If I am going to "be the change" I need to have an honest understanding of both my strengths and weaknesses.

Coming to Belize, there's equal parts opportunity to put on my Savior cape and parade through the streets and equal parts opportunity to curl up in a ball overwhelmed. There's beauty in that balance. I don't ever want to fly in to save the day, only to discover I'm wearing the Emperor's New Clothes. I need advisors and friends who will show me the truth, even if it knocks me down a peg.

Eddie and I have been so blessed in recent weeks to see a small circle of Belizean friends forming around us. They are neighbors, church members and fellow ministers who we've shown our weakness to and who have leaned in to become a source of strength. There are plenty of things we need help with, between navigating schools, real estate, culture and politics. By being vulnerable and asking for help, we are gaining so much from their wisdom and generosity.

Even more importantly, we are establishing relationships where we're not pretending to be invincible. We are saying from the get-go that we need others' strength to lift us when we're down and we need others to point out our blind spots too. Maybe when we take turns being strong for others and accepting their support, we will have the longevity and authenticity to be the change we want to see.