A Post-Columbian Lament

This day, across the Americas, has historically been celebrated. In Canada it's Thanksgiving. In the US it's Columbus Day. In Belize it's called Pan-America Day. We celebrate Columbus for "discovering" new lands and peoples to subjugate under foreign power.

The discovery of the “New World” allowed European countries like Portugal, Spain, France, The Netherlands and Britain to have global empires. It opened doors for soldiers, pilgrims, con-men, slave owners and slave traders to invade and take over entire civilizations. It brought the "Good News" encased in imperialism, violence and genocide. Somehow that doesn't seem like something I should be celebrating.

There has been growing sentiment that Columbus Day should be taken out of the American calendar, or renamed Indigenous Peoples Day. This renaming puts the focus not on those who came to steal, kill and destroy, but those who were subjected to the violence and destruction they wrought.

Rather than celebrating, can we commemorate? Rather than overlooking the pain or forgetting the sacrifice, can we lament what happened on this land that wasn't ours?

No matter where you go in the Americas, the crippling effect of colonization on indigenous peoples can be seen and felt. In each location, disease accompanied the explorers, then came war, tearing apart families, shipping them off to residential schools or reservations, the denying of their lands, culture, language...the list goes on.

History is rarely told by the oppressed. The conquest of the "savages" was only written by those who were educated, wealthy and holding the power. Unfortunately, many of those people professed to be Christians.

It galls me when Christianity becomes synonymous with nationalism, oppression and violence. The Good News is about freeing those in bondage, forgiving one's enemies, feeding and clothing the poor; none of which are the hallmarks of a colonizing force.

Today I take inventory. I ask the Lord to seek my heart, my motives and actions. Find in me the ways that I've confused national identity with kingdom culture. Show me if I have misrepresented the Good News as something that hurts, rather than liberates. Forgive me when I have walked over people who are vulnerable.

Proverbs 14;31 says, "Whoever oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker,

but whoever is kind to the needy honors God."

I can't turn back time and undo the pain that Columbus wrought when he set sail in 1492. My role is to be a modern-day disciple; someone that follows Jesus into the streets and boroughs. Someone who extends a hand and offers a cool drink. Someone who will lay down her rights and power in service to others.

"Peace" of my Heart

Several years ago, as a newly stay-at-home mom of two young kids, I felt God encourage me to start a friendship with another mom from church. Over the years I did my best to be a good friend to her. I walked with her through some very dark times in her life and marriage. I spoke the truth in love and had patience for her journey, chaotic as it was. She was a good listener and supported me too.

Over the years, our husbands became friends and now we had de facto cousins for our kids to have sleepovers with. We took family trips, ate meals, played games and sang karaoke together. We had completely different views of the world, but our common faith and love for each other meant we could share our perspectives without harming each other.

Then came 2020 and all the political and social media hysteria that came with it. Out of the blue one day, several months ago, we got an email from my friend. A mutual acquaintance had tipped her off that we "hated America" and they would be withdrawing their support of our ministry. My friend and her husband said they too could no longer in good conscience send their American dollars to support our work here.

I was shocked and wounded that these dear friends would sever ties with us over our convictions about racism. They didn't offer to have a conversation about how we came to those convictions, instead they sent us videos of black people who shared their perspective, so we'd understand how wrong we are. At the time, and over the ensuing months, we didn't have the energy (with everything else that's going on) to fight for that friendship, so we let them walk away.

A theme in some of our youth work lately has been relationships. We've looked at how some of those relationships can become toxic. We've discussed how we can love others, but establish healthy boundaries etc. I shared how sometimes those relationships end, and that that's ok.

The thing is, I don't feel ok. This isn't the first time a close friend has walked away because of my convictions, and I'll tell ya, it sucks.

Romans 12:18 says, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."

As a middle child, I am a peace-maker. I want everyone to get along and to respect each other's opinions. One of my childhood tendencies is to try to coerce and manipulate people into my version of peace. This is sin.

I cannot make other people live at peace with me or anyone else. I can't make people understand my heart or even care enough to try. I cannot control if friends want to be in my life or spit on my grave. All I can do is "if it is possible, as far as it depends on (me), live at peace with everyone."

So, hurt and disappointed, I will pray for my friend, wish her the best and live my life at peace.

Choice Fruit

I'm restless, once again, about this state of limbo we're inhabiting. I find myself checking real estate sites, counting down the weeks we have left in our lease, asking God if He would just clue us in, for goodness sake!

In the midst of my mind running from one question, one possibility to the next, I am reminded of something He told me a couple of months ago. At that time, as now, I was asking God for answers and I felt Him say to me, "Stop asking for answers. I'm not going to give you answers now. Ask for comfort."

Then, as now, comfort is not what I wanted, but it's what I need.

One of the first stories in the Bible is about two people who have an intimate connection with God. He talks to them, He provides for them, He teaches them and spends time with them. His only request is that they stay dependent on Him.

There are two identified trees in the Garden. One was the Tree of Life. They were welcomed to eat of that fruit and any other they found, except the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

Genesis 2:17 "...but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”

By choosing that fruit, our innocence is forfeited. Our child-like dependency on God is shattered, replaced by knowledge, replaced by the tug-of-war between good and evil. No longer trusting in God's nearness and provision, our concerns are about how we will eat, what we will wear, how we will take care of ourselves.

"In that day that you eat of it you shall surely die." Connection and intimacy with God is life. Dependence on Him frees us to live fully. Disconnection and distrust is an absence of that life; it's a degree of spiritual death.

When God invites me to stop striving, He is inviting me to eat the fruit of a different tree; one that comforts and fills even when I don't have all the answers. Will I take Him up on His offer? Or will I stubbornly insist on the fruit that places me back in the driver's seat and out of alignment with the life He has planned for me?

Once again I must choose the source of my life. Will it be knowledge and striving? Good versus evil? Or will it be child-like faith and walking in intimate connection with my Creator? He invites me and He warns me, but ultimately the choice is mine.